What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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What's worse than being single on Valentine's Day? Finding out your son has AIDS.

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops