What's one plus one? two.

A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

Why couldn't the grandma remember what she did last night? Because she has Alzeihmers and grandmas don't do anything.

Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

A black guy and a Hispanic guy are in a car together. Who's driving? The black guy.

Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969 i like potatos 696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

i dont care if you rate me or not

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

A man ate a lot of ice cream he had double bypass surgery 3 months later

People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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