What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

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Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

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What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

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How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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Why did the little girl cry A rabi slapped her and stole her ice cream

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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