I have a knock knock joke. You go first.

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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Why doesn't the South Pole war veteran remember the name of his child? He is a penguin and could care less about naming his children. Why doesn't the penguin on the North Pole remember the name of his child? There are no penguins on the North Pole.

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Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

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8================================================================================================D-------------------------------------------- It can coil!

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wanna here an anti joke scroll down

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What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

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Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

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Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

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Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

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Want to hear the best joke? Your life :,( i think i hate you?

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Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Death is inevitable.

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What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

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How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

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What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

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Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

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What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

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How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

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Your mom is so fat...

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A man walks into a bar and the barenter says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll take a Bud Light."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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