A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

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Women Drivers.

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What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

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Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

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Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

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Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

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Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

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What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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