There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I forgot the rest, Don't laugh at me...

When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

I put my baby in a microwave.

If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

your mum

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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