Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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I can't see my forehead

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Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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Kate

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Oh...okay, good.

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How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

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why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

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What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

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What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

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Women rights..

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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