Who has a big nose? YOU!!!

What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

A hispanic man eats a taco and enjoys. He is kicked in the nuts 2 months later.

Why didn't Johnny get into college? Because Johnny is retarded.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was black

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

Most of these Anti-Jokes are Anti-Anti jokes, which makes them funny, if they were actually Anti-Jokes they wouldn't be funny at all.

yo' Mamma's so fat when she stepped on the scale, she said "hey, that's my phone number"!

What's blue, and smells like fish? A firetruck, I was kidding about the blue and fish.

question:How do you call a Russian with Ak47. answer: Spetznaz

Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

Whats the difference between a pizza and a baby? Humans don't eat babies, other than a Cannibals because some tend to eat babies.

What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

i had sex i stuck my dick into your mouth

what did the blind man see? Nothing he felt the penis in his butt.

Priest: "Matt, will you take Senae to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?" Matt: No

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

What did Pikachu say to Charmander? Nothing. Pokemon are fictional creatures, and thus, do not exist.

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a women. Why can't Stephen Hawking speak freely with his voice? Because he's autistic.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the little child orphan with no arms or legs get for christmas? CANCER and for his birthday A.I.D.S. R.I.P little orphan

Hi what I lug you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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