What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

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What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

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What's black and red and can go through time. I don't know but you have cancer and are going to die very soon.

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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A lion walks into a barber shop and asks for a haircut and the barber says no then the lion proceeds to kill everyone in the shop

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knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

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So a moose walks into a grocery store and asks the clerk, who is a penguin, "Where's the bread?" And the penguin says "On isle three!" But, when the moose gets to isle three... The bread isn't there!

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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What do you call a middle-aged man at a preschool? A teacher.

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How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

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What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

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A YouTube brawl began between two gentlemen in the comment section. They agreed to a final answer and moved on.

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How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

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why is john so fat years of over eating

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A penguin on fire

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Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

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A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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Roses are Red Violets are dog I'm Senile Flower tastes like frog.

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What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

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roses are scarce, violets are farse, come over here and i'll stick it up ya ar#e.

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Nyan cat had pancakes for breakfast.

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In Soviet Russia, the political system was very different than it is today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops