Where do you go when you die? Nowhere

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Knock Knock Who's there? ... No one, you have Schizophrenia

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why was the spoiled girl running from her parents? because they weren't her parents, they were kidnappers and were going to sell her into underground sex trafficking markets where she would probably spend the rest of her life being a slave.

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knock knock whos there Aids, now you've got it

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roses are red violets are blue you might think i can write poems but, bit i really really can't

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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What's worse than tieing a baby to a moving fan? Stopping it with a shovel

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Q:What's worse than stepping on lego? A:Hiroshima.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Knock knock Whoes there? ...

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why did the chicken cross the road? I Lied, it was a cow not a chicken and it was a highway full of speeding cars slamming into the cow body until it would stop moooooooooooooooooving...

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Why do black people have dark skin? Lack of melanin in their skin. You learn something new every day.

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Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a known serial killer.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "What's up?" The man replies, "The opposite of down."

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How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

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What time does lunch usually begin on the other side of the world. Noon.

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What do you do with a pickle jar full of semen? Use it for gel, because it took so long to collect it all, and you're frugal person who believes in recycling.

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Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? **purges**

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How do you make a clown sad? Rape his wife, choke his grandma and send him a video of you setting his children on fire.

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kronkel spasm dizzle nork is short for: i cant believe you bought a ninja monkey to scratch your clownitis! i am randomly going to have a spasm cause i am down with that dizzle..... lets watch a show callled norks! i am pregnant with your baby ducky.

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what do you get when you cross a rhino and a chicken? well, if you're unlucky and too close too the chicken, salmonella if you provoke the rhino, impaled

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What's the difference between slavery and the Holocaust? Slavery happened.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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