What do you call a really small grape? A grape.

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Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

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Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

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Womens Rights.

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What is black, has either black or yellow stripes, and cannot climb trees? A parking lot.

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how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

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How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

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What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

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Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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if x marks the spot, what does y do? y does the laundry.

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What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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Why do white people despise black people? Because they are good at everything we suck at.

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A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

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Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: That question doesn't make any sense.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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Society.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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