What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

Hey, Texas! Knock knock Texas: Who's there? Ebola

twilight

what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

What do you call a black airman? A pilot!

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

Biggest lie ever told... Mrs. Beiber, its a boy.

Knock-knock who's there? interrupting cow interupting cow who? moo.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

A Jew walks into a bar The bar owner looks at a gang of punks in the back and shouts "YOU! GET OUT!" The Jew leaves the bar.

You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

Betty Whites ALIVE?

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

Nickelback ranked number 1 as greatest rock band according to rolling stones magazine!

whats worse than your computer crashing? your plane crashing...twice

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white Stop stereotyping roses, already.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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