Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

Stop driving smart cars you fags

i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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