Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Find a half-worm.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

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What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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Your face is hilarious.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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