Joesph Triphook.

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Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

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A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

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There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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rocky is here again.......................

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jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

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Why did the trombone player have sex so often? Because he was hot.

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Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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Horse.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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Your mom is so old she died

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What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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