Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

Yo mamas so fat.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

Your mother is so bad at cooking that people often remark on how bad at cooking she is.

What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

Whats worse than a little kid falling. Him getting vigorously raped by his father every night.

What does it smell like, what does it feel like, do you like it? Yes

What happens when you throw a green stone into the red sea? It gets wet.

a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

;aosughdfo

where do you find sunglasses at? the store

Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

Why couldn't the Black man become a surgeon? He was Blind.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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