Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because the branch broke.

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Q. How do you get a black man out of a tree? A. You get a ladder and help him down

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What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

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Why was the boy stuck? He's under a tree.

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Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

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If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

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Ask me if I'm a tree... Are you a tree? No.

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What is more funny than an anti joke? A real joke.

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

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Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

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your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

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Q: What's the worst part of 3 Mexicans dying in a car accident? A: They were my friends.

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

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A nig-ger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nig-gers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nig-ger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nig-ger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nig-ger, go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nig-ger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nig-ger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nig-gers, smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he was dead

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why did the boy commit scuicide? Because he was mentaly scared due to constant tormenting and teasing from his friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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