What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? Dead.

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What did the deaf person say to the comedian? ... ... ... ... I'm sorry, did you say something?

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Knock knock --Come in.

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Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

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What happened to the starving african kid? He died

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you are black i am black except for your big hairy ass

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Where do babies come from? My garage

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the grass is always greener on the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

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What's the best thing about 27 year old's? There are 20 of them.

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Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

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What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

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Jim and Dave walk into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll it be?" Dave is black.

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A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

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What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a women. Why can't Stephen Hawking speak freely with his voice? Because he's autistic.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain. Chuck promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense.

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(Put joke here)

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders whiskey. An American enters the same bar. He orders a beer. A blonde Frenchwoman enters the same bar. She says "Gimme whatever the Irisman ordered! Double it! He's cool!" She started talking to the American

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Your mama's so poor, that it's hard for her to pay her bills.

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if youre reading this its probably because youre on anti-joke.com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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