ok so there was a black guy a white guy and an asian in a bar.so the asian guy says lets leave and they all exited the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm about to kill you Don't scream, here's a lollipop

thumb_up thumb_down +25

- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A boy was constantly getting bullyed at school... so he went home

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was Bill in jail? He stabbed 17 black people because they didn't deserve welfare checks.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what red black and white al over? a t.v I was kidding about the red part

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Why did the Mexican jump over the fence? A: He went to go retrieve the ball that was kicked in his neighbor's yard. Afterwords, he continued playing soccer with his friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the chicken cross the road? he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

thumb_up thumb_down +23

yo momma so fat that she's fat

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Dont be mean Dyslexics are teople poo

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock. who's there? well, its not suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

thumb_up thumb_down +21

An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops