If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first? Answer: Newton's Law dictates that they would hit the ground at the same time.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

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buttcrack thumbs up

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What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

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What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

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A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

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Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

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BOOBIES!!!!!!!

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The police, we have several warrants for your arrest.

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

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Why did sally fall off the wings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there NOT SALLY HAHAHAHA LOVE YOU JK

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

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your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

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That's Racist

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Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

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What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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