Billy: You're so ugly you made an onion cry! Jack: I'm rubber and you are glue, whatever you say bounces back and sticks to you. Billy was so upset at what he said and decided to leave.

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

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How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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