Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

WHYS S AFRAID OF B CAUSE OF SBB

I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

Why wasn't Will invited to the party? Will has been dead for 3 years.

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Get a giant scorpion to rape him.

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

Billy: You're so ugly you made an onion cry! Jack: I'm rubber and you are glue, whatever you say bounces back and sticks to you. Billy was so upset at what he said and decided to leave.

Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

What do you call a muslim flying a plane> .....a pilot

what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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