Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

Sarah Palin

Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

Why do Jews hate hitler? They are jealous of him.

Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

Why couldn't Prince William go to the party? Because his WIFE bought tickets to the f**cking ballet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...