Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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A hayride would be fun.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Chikin nuggets

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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guess what the quarterback did he threw the ball!

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

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Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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