Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

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Why did the girl drown? She had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

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Adam and Eve ate the apple and felt a bit ashamed and stuff. God looked upon them and said, well its just a fucking apple get outta here you kids! Adam and Eve also took things a bit too literal

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Mr Dalgleish in a formal setting, Kenny in an informal one.

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What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

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"Aids" "What?" "Yup, you just got aids­­­."

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

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How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

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A black man, a jewish man and an asian man walk into a bar. They are attending the wake of a friend who died of cancer.

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What's more painful than having your girlfriend cheat on you and leave you? Having your **** bitten off slowly.

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WHART++EWEEEEEEEP FLARPEN CARPEN FLARP

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Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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Q. Whats worse than 9 babies in 1 suitcase? A. 1 baby in 9 suitcases.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

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What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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Chuck Norris is dead......

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Manchester City

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Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

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Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 was having illicit sexual relationships with 9, of which 6 knew about, but was afraid to inform his wife, 8, who 7 stepped over to get to 9.

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Roses are red Violets are blue These two lines are overused I wonder to what poem they originally come from

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A man went back in time and warned nobody about anything and pretended to be from the time he choose to go to and lived a happy life eventually finding a wife. He later found out he had a baby on the way, he named it after his great grandfather who was a war hero. He later found out that many years later his son had a son and they named it after his grandpa. He went to the hospital where he died just as his grandson had a baby and they named it after his father. The man died. End.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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