What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Dementia Pickles

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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What time is it when an elephant steps on your watch? Time to go to the hospital and get treated for a shattered wrist.

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If i open this door you can go trough it

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Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

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What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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The continent of Africa is mired in corruption, poverty, food crises, disease, and the exploitation of its resources. Happy Kwanzaa

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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what ate all the ants in the hill? an anteater

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Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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A man walks into a bar. He suffers a fatal concussion and the playground is shut down by local police until proper padding is installed.

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What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

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Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

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i read the terms of service when i posted this

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Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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