What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Nothing, we eat pizza and we respect Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A black guy gets a job...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: Art.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a guy and two girls are at the bottom of the ocean? A guy and two girls at the bottom of the ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

At home, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 10 mins, it's 3:30. At school, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 20 mins, it's 3:40 and schools been finished for ten minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black man walks into a Ku Klux Klan meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A retarded man speaks jibberish, because he is retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

roses are red, violets are violet.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Bags of delicious poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

In this country, you gotta get the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, you get shot the F*** up at the end of Scarface.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock! Who's there? Boo! Boo who? Aww, don't cry!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you fit 10 dead babies in a bowl? A blender How do you get them out? Chips

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the duck cross the road? Because it was going to the destination he wanted to go to.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What has legs but can't walk? A table...or a dog with four broken legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

thumb_up thumb_down -5

josh Roberts you speccy CUNT

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops