What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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This sentence is false.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

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What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

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What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

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I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

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what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

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I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

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What did the children in India eat for dinner?

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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What is the difference between a mom and a dad? One is a mom and the other is a dad. Why couldn't Fred see the board? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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Why did the white man go to jail? He broke the law.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

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Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

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so there was two ducks in a bathtub. one duck says to the other duck, "hey, can you pass me the soap? the other duck says no.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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