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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

A Jewish, Italian, and Russian man are stranded on an island. Eventually the Russian man dies from heatstroke, leaving the other two to decide whether or not to feast on his remains. The Italian eventually goes mad and tries to murder the Jewish man who is forced to defend himself and kill his remaining friend. Shortly after, the Jewish man is eventually rescued by a passing German vessel after suffering severe dehydration and malnourishment and hanging on only by his faith in God. As they are leading him to safety, the Jewish man eventually summons the strength to tell his saviors about the horrible things he has done and all he has gone through, not knowing if he'll ever be able to forgive himself. His German rescuers take one awkward look at him, and don't know what to say to help him, leading afterwards to several years of PTSD therapy and rehabilitation.

Q. How do you get a dinosaur off a slide? A. You tell him he hasn't lived for billions of years.

What happens when two jews meet in the bus ? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it's not worth telling a joke about that.

When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

What did the unappreciated YTPer say in the comment section of Nyan Cat? "PLEASE CHECK OUT MY YTP'S! I'M BEGGING YOU! YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!! WHY?!!! Q_Q"

A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

why did the kid get a bad grade he didnt study

There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is your mom

What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

My children are huge mistakes.

Justin's humor

What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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