How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

well use a tissue!

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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