Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

Why does everyone tell black jokes? Because everyone hates black people.

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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