What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

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knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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What is the mexican dream? To jump the border

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he'd would like to make a wager. The bartender replies, "no."

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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James Patrick Campbell

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What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

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What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

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How do you make a telemarketer scream? Set him on fire.

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Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

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What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

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Whats better than sex? Not dying. Ha

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Once upon time the government was corrupt Jk, it always has been

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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