Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

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I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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What's the main difference between dogs and children? When children reach their teen years they grow up and leave home. When dogs reach their teen years they die of old age.

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save me from the nothing ive become

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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like this if you think what ever you want to..

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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The awkward moment when Delilah got hit by a bus.

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Q. Why didn't the Atheist enter the church? A. Because Atheists do not go to church so he had no reason to enter.

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A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

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Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

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(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

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have you seen hellen kellers new treehouse? no well neither has she

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops