Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A kid has no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A woman leaves the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

whats bloody and mingen Scabbaz head

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the guitar player cross the road? to play his gig

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm Scizophrenic And so am I.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's more annoying than dyslexic jokes? Jokes were peopel spel words rong.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The game.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +19

- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

"why did the cheese not go to church on sunday" "because it was jewish"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops