What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

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If an aeroplane falls from 15,000 feet in the air and crashes into and orphanage is it possible that no-one will get hurt? No,the aeroplane will destroy the orphange hurting the property value.

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A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to get intoxicated and then commits a felony.

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Ouch.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the octopus say to the squid? Nothing, considering these two species can't speak.

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What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I got a baseball bat can i talk to you ?

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What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

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Decode this; Hetay owcay aidsay oomay. Answer: ummmmm.... Let me think....ummm, does anybody speak pig latin?

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What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

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Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

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What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

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My next door neighbour found out yesterday that I am a serial killer. Knock Knock. [L]

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What can make you pee? Liquid

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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What's black and Has 8 legs? Gang Rape.

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A man called the police and was later arrested for murdering himself,

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

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What does 1 black person on the moon mean? A problem. What do 2 black people on the moon mean? A problem. What does every black person on the world on the moon mean? It's still a problem.

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"Hey baby, how much?" "$2.99 each or 2 for $5.00, Steve." "Thanks Baby, I'll take 2."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops