What do u call a banana? A banana......

What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why was the little girl happy? because she found an icecream cone

what do you call a guy called Bill? Bill

Dumb

what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

What did Mr. Sandman do whrn the boy asked for one too many dreams, nothing because Mr. Sandman was the boys bitch.

There are two kinds of people in this world: those that finish their sentences

What's similar about a mole and an eagle? They both are blind and dig through the ground. Except the eagle.

What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Interrupting kid with ADHD" *I did not respond, as I knew he would interrupt me before I was able to finish the sentence.*

I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

How did Chinese people get their names? They throw their pots and pans down the stairs. It says, "CHING CHANG CHONG!!!"

Whats 9 + 10? 19.

Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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