Roses are Red Violets are blue You little stupid ass bitch I ain't fucking with you

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I'm a champion. I do what I want.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the mexican order a bean burrito? Because thats his favorite

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A black man has a job.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than slipping on a bannana peel? The Gestapo. Go to Aushwitz now.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Bariande: I have a belly button Kraken: haha who doesnt? MissAwkward: i dont Barinade: neither do i. haha this happened on tiny chat.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's Brown and dirty? Dirt

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops