Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken would greatly appreciate it if you stayed out of its personal life.

What did the sushi say to the bee? Nothing, a piece of sushi can't talk and a bee wouldn't listen, stupid.

How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

Lady wanna go out sometime? Im not lesbian girl! Im not a girl... OUCHIE!

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

If dropped from the same height, which hits the ground first an apple or a baby? the apple because the baby has a rope tied around its neck

If you like this, it will have one extra like

A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

Anyone??????????/

A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

Why will this joke be the most hated? Because it sucks

How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

GONNA

if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John. John Anderson. Dude we've been friends since first grade! You really don't remember me? I'm going home!

why did the asian go to the bar? they were told they could drive better when drunk how much worse could they get

What is black, white and red all over? A black man has been shot and a white paramedic is standing over him trying to save his life.

I pooped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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