How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

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muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

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"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

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Type 2 diabetics

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What does the young boy say to the gay man Hello Jacob, because he was raised to respect and treat gays equally

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Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

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A man sees a bum laughing. He asks the bum "Why are you laughing", at which point the bum replies "I'm a bum!"

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What's worse than a needle in a hay stack? A needle in a stack of drug addicts.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

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What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

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Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops