What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

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What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

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Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

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How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

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How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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What do u call a women between to black guys? -loose

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What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

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Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

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a korean guy robs a black guys convenient store!

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What did the kid say when you gave him a cookie? Thank you.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops