What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

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'Hey do you know a joke?' 'No' 'Me too'

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Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Once upon a time there was a little puppy. He then grew old and died.

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What's the difference between a Satyr play and a Sedar meal? One is full of horned goat-men, the other is a feast that marks the beginning of Passover.

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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Go away.

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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Brett Farve

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

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What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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