What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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clamidia

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Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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knock knock. no one's home..

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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My mom touched my wiener : \

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops