roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

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Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

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What do you call a muslim in an airplane? Whatever his name may be, though you could, of course, choose not to address him, though if it were a two-seater plane, it would be good manners to exchange polite conversation.

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They see me rolling' Up my sleeves for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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A man was eating a hamburger when a boy came up and took his hamburger. So the got up and went to the counter and orderd another hamburger

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What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

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Rose's are red, violets are red, trees are red, bushes are red, oh God the garden's on fire.

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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