What do you get when you cross a chicken with an alligator? Go take some acid and find out for yourself

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Your mom

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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What happens when a super saiyan eats a fully grown pineapple? hehe xd

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You write a really difficult riddle in braille and tell her to solve it.

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what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

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What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

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So after 2 years of dating, the man thought the woman actually loved him. So to find out they took a ski trip and during their day they were on the chairlift and the man asked the woman "Do you love me?" The woman replied "No...I'm just in it for the sex, but that's a nice ski mask you have on"

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what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

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My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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What's worse than eating a rotton fruit that makes you sick?? Getting raped by a giant jackalope and then being left for dead in the middle of nowhere and being found by an old pedophile whose van ran out of gas and then running away only to find some water but while you were drinking it you got grabbed and dragged under the water by an octopus who has wandered off many miles from its home and then dying because humans don't have gills

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Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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What's a group of people that has an N, an I, two Gs, an E and an R that have no souls? Gingers.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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A lawyer gets admitted to a bar.

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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