Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

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A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

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Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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America

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

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A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

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Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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