What's black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you get your girlfriend's yapping Chihuahua to be quiet? Throw it through a window.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock, Knock. Who's there Hey, it's Dave. Oh well come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sarah Palin

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

ow

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you make someone to go away from you? You rape them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rape him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rape him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man scratches his ankle and says " my nuts are itchy" a woman looks at him questionly. realizing he had been watched, he lifted the bottom of his pant leg and showed to woman that he had stuffed his socks with pecans.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: Shoot it.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops