- Anti Joke

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human language promptly shits on the floor then leaves.

Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more likely you are to realize that beans aren't actually fruit. They're legumes.

What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

What is a dead cat on the side of the road. A free cat.

whats yellow and blue and green all over? the color green

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

How did the jew win a marathon? Through hard vigorous training by running everyday and eating healthy.

Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. On of them was moderately amusing and took home the modest prize.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human language promptly shits on the floor then leaves.

Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

Why doesn't Lebron James have any rings? Cuz he didn't win a championship.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

Roses are red, tires are black, why is your chest as flat as your back!