Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

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get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Sucks to be a fish.

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What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

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Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

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Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

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Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What happened when the man lost his sandwich? He couldnt eat.

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What is the difference between a blonde and a Mexican? Their hair color.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

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The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

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I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

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What do you call a building full of black people Jail

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I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

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What did the children in India eat for dinner?

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Why did Helen Keller's cat kill itself? It didn't, I did.

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roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

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Gay Rights

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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What did the comedian tell the audience? A well thought out joke that anyone can relate to because that is what the point of a joke is.

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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