What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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Roses are red violets are blue come on love show me you boobs/by kw

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Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

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A man walks into a bar and says "I'd like a beer."

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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Hello Braydon

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How did Jimmy get into the R movie? He bought a ticket.

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The chicken crossed the road.

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What do you call a black pilot? A niigger

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E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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A man ate a lot of ice cream he had double bypass surgery 3 months later

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How do you fit four gays on a barstool? You turn it upside down

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roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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please ignore the bottom two 'jokes' as they were written by josh carey and ryan danielz

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Q: Whats worse than Coke A: Diet Coke

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So it was 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar......I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ended up getting nuked

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What do you get when you cross Sir Elton John with a sabertooth tiger. I don't know but you better keep it away from your ass.

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What's worse than seeing 5 dead babies on the side of the road? Realizing slavery is banned after buying a perfectly good young black male for a reasonable price at your local walmart.

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Goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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Random letters vJKkBvCffsgfsjxmsocowdbwfeascbsa

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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