How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

banana

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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